A Sorta Fairytale

While waiting for Vir for lunch awhile ago, I overheard two friends talking. They were both a little old but from the way they sat, talked, and laughed, it was very evident that they were pretty strong and still energetic for their age.

Girl: "Nakakainis my kids! They kept on calling and calling! They're now in America living the lives that they wanted. They wanted to be independent and so I finally let them go. For once I want to live my own life. Now that Im pretty old, Id like to travel! I want to go places and I have enough money for it! I have provided all my kids their own houses in La Vista and in the US and now all I want is a condo where I can relax everytime I go home from a vacation. I need one, you know!"

Boy: "Then I'll go with you! Punta tayo Milan next week you want?"

Girl: "Sige!"

They didn't seem like lovers to me. They just looked like two old friends who have remained that way since forever. I would love that too.

Im happy Im living my life the way I want it to be right now. There might be little disappointments on the side, but at least I get to live my life the way I want it to be. I don't want to grow old and imagine the what couldve been life. I want to take things slow, absorb every thing that's happening and let it all sink in. I dont want to forget. I dont want to be forgotten.

Look at how free Tori Amos is. She's such a goddess. I love her

A Certain Romance

The point's that there ain't no romance around there, and there's the truth that they can't see. They'd probably like to throw a punch at me and if you could only see them, then you would agree that there ain't no romance around there.

They'll never listen 'cause their minds are made up and, OF COURSE, it's all okay to carry on that way

Over there there's broken bones, and it don't take no Sherlock Holmes to see it's a little different.

I should have said:
No! Oh no!
Well you won't get me to go!
Not anywhere, not anywhere
No I won't go

But as expected, I didn't.

Over there there's friends of mine. What can I say, I've known 'em for a long long time and yah, they might overstep the line but I just cannot get angry in the same way.


Wish me luck. I'll be going to some place I know I'll be too uncomfortable to even talk. Guardian angel, be with me tonight.

Caring is creepy

One minute we're the best of friends, or so others assume we are, next minute we can't bear seeing each other. It's never gonna end, huh? Sometimes I wonder why I even bother reaching out. It's so useless that from now on, I'd rather do my own pedicure and manicure than reach out to you guys. And to think I hate doing that.


I do deserve pretty things because.. well I just do. I'm your fucking daughter for crying out loud! I have the right to leech from your so-called riches and use it to my advantage in any way possible. But do I actually get to have that luxury? Sige, fine, sometimes. But when you compare my status with Bobby's, or Patricia's even, God, you wouldn't even consider me part of the family anymore! I swear. I was jealous before but now, I don't even know what to feel. I hope I'm that jaded but I'm still not.

Pucha, SO WHAT. Fine, buy Bobby his second car. Fine, give him my new laptop 'cause you think he needs it more than I do. Go ahead, looks like he's missing out on a lot of things anyway. I'm happy being the person you don't text anymore. I'm happy that I get to go to anywhere I want to, whenever I want to. I'm finally free from you guys. Finally.

This is so relaxing. Weird.

Long live comfort in strangeness! I want you.

La Copa

"Karen, would you like to be a stylist for the La Copa Sample Sale?" - Warner
"Kelan?!" - me

Fab couture + Fab, fun friends and familiar faces = Love.

Being a stylist was more of a hobby than a job to me. After the call from Warner, I literally jumped for joy. I was gonna do the one thing that I learned to love - being a stylist! Call me shallow, maarte, feeling, superficial, whatever! I do not care. I get to be surrounded by pretty clothes plus I get to see the former Tyler people again! Who would wanna miss that?

Working for 7 hours waiting for elite, stylish customers was nothing compared to what I've been through before so the whole event was a stroll in the park. Wawa the other girls though who weren't used to the demands of the job; they all looked so tired after the first day. There's so many ugly things in the world that being surrounded by beautiful creations is an opportunity.

I finally convinced myself that the pregnant look is so not for me. I actually look pregnant whenever I wear those items so I guess I'll stick to the body-shaping clothes.

Pieces I love:

oh and Rej's shoes too! To die for!

Tyler faves: Di, Warner, Rej, Sugar, Sid, Jorja, Ida, Na, Abby, Nica, Lala

I missed you guys!

On a High

Overtime on the very first day at work. Crazy!

I was assigned to the Planning Department and I love it! It's way better than the Creatives, I think. I love love love iiiitttt. Pucha need I say more?!

The moment I sat down on (take note) my desk, (Yes, I have my own space and Im proud of it. E so kung mababaw?!), Sir Ray said: "Ok, here's what we're gonna do." Imagine, not even 30 mins spared for company intro and the crap! We were rushing for the deadline tomorrow. He showed me everything that I was to do and to tell you honestly, the more he enumerated everything that I had to do, the more I got kilig. Who wouldn't?! I was even solely assigned to that one project that's due on Friday and I haven't started anything yet! It's such a high I can't stop daydreaming about what's gonna happen tomorrow! Going to work is way better than any drug out there.

Oh and the other newbies are way fun too!

Okay. I believe I have to stop now. I look like a person who hasn't eaten in months salivating over a piece of bread.

Aspac Advertising: Global Creative Business

Our Philosophy :

Who We Are

We are communication partners focused on brand creation and re-creation. We strive to create a compelling market advantage for our Clients by leveraging the tools of marketing communications.

What We Do

We constantly seek out ways to do things better not for the sake of being different, but in the pursuit of business success for our Clients.

What We Believe In

1. We believe that a great agency can outsmart the competition without needing to outspend them.
2. We believe that brilliant creativity is an unfair advantage in the marketplace.
3. We believe that constantly challenging the status quo ensures the best and most effective work.
4. That a client list should be handpicked and small, so agency principals and key people can stay neck-deep in client business.

www.aspac.com.ph

Tomorrow's my first day. Wish me luck!

Sumammer na!

And to think I expected this summer to be a boring one.

Reasons why I should my summer is worth a one biiig smile from ear to ear:
1. BEACH
a. Bora with my bitches: 6 days, 5 nights all expenses paid! It was all perfect - fab group, fab beach, fab crowd, fab resort, not to mention the fab picnic we had while watching the sunset (complete with sparkling and red wine, blue cheese, and chocolates courtesy of Raffy). Beer + beach + friends = perfect.

b. Puerto: Oh yes, my MC lovies will be there. Can't wait.

c. Calatagan: Only girlies are allowed.

2. OJT
San Miguel was the first to accept me. They wanted me to start asap because they needed someone like me daw. What the hell did that mean? Anyway, I turned it down 'cause I had to go to the beach first. Haha. Sayang but sokey! Then there's GMA. I did almost all the processes already; I sent the letters, got my good moral for the company and attended the orientation. In the end though, I had to turn the offer down again. They were gonna place me at their Legal Division. COME ON. I am not up for that. Then there's Six Degrees Strategic Design. It's an Ad Agency that focuses on low budget advertising. I am really interested. I might try there if there's time left this summer.

Finally. Right when I was feeling sad because I didn't have a multinational company to go to (Oh yes, it should be multinational. Otherwise, my dad will get so disappointed), ASPAC Advertising texts me to say that I have an interview the very next day! Everything went well. I love it. Im part of the Creatives and I'm so fucking proud of it! Yey.

Post Secrets

Every single person has at least one secret that would break your heart. If we could just remember this, I think there would be a lot more compassion and tolerance in the world.

Here are some secrets of strangers that I believe can be mine as well.
I don't want to grow old. If possible, I want to die when I'm 50 already. Ok fine, at most is 55. I'm afraid to be useless. I'm terrified that someday, nobody will ever want me anymore, and that I will have no value to anyone, not even to the ones I consider as my family. I want to be remembered as someone who loved life and not someone who, in the end, became a depressed looking-out-the-window type of old person.
I've been lied to so many times in my life, but lying to someone is, for some reason, the worst feeling. It's not the lying that's hard 'cause truth is , lying is one of the easiest things to do in the world. It's the thought of the person that's been lied to finding out about the whole lying thing. It's never gonna be easy and fun to hurt someone.

Cmon, I bet everyone's done this already.
I usually tell this to myself when I'm drunk and I see someone cute. I just can't help it sometimes. What more if all the guys in the world are 300-ish?! My God, I'll be a slut then, and I won't be ashamed of it. For now though, I'll be settled with dirty thoughts.

Thank God! If they're not as screwed up as they are now, I could have committed isolation due to no fun from the outside world. I love that my friends are drunkards. I love that they are magnets of problems. I love that we are all crazy, fucked up people. That makes us one hellava fun group! I don't care whether or not they really are bad influences. As long as I'm happy and as long as they're not ruining my studies, I'm fine with the everyday drinking.Who isn't?!

Naked and Sacred

This world can be so cold, I wanna hold you naked and sacred 'til I grow old. I wanna be good for you, I wanna be true.

I am, sadly, needy by nature. You say I am not easily contented with what I have, but if you'll look a little closer, you'll see that all I actually need is you. And with you, I have peace.

By the way!!!!!!!!!!!!! There is nothing wrong with being needy, more so materialistic. There are so many beautiful things in this world and it's up to us to appreciate them. Haha BULL! Look, even the Pope wears Prada!

"He may never make the best-dressed lists, but Pope Benedict XVI is nothing short of a religious-fashion icon, riding in the Popemobile with red Prada loafers under his cassock and Gucci shades. But his penchant for designer wear and a move to ditch the papal tailors who have dressed popes for more than 200 years are causing new wrinkles in the Vatican. Benedict has favored his tailor from his days as cardinal, Alessandro Cattaneo, and the 20-year-old religious-fashion house of Raniero Mancinelli, which has provided the pope with dazzling new vestments (some with shimmering, sequinlike details). At risk of losing the papal-dress contract are the Annibale Gammarelli tailors, who have made papal wear since 1792. But they blundered when Benedict had to make his debut blessing in a cassock that was too short, ending just above his ankles. Subsequent celebratory vestments made by Gammarelli are reported to have made the pope uncomfortable.

The Vatican won't comment on papal attire, and Gammarelli denies it is getting the ax: "We are still in contact with the Holy Father. Perhaps there was only an occasional gift by some friend of the pontiff," the tailor says.
—Barbie Nadeau, Newsweek

HEYYYY ARNOLLDD!!**

This is Sparta!

WTF

"The MC Basketball Team has witnessed your skills in the recent intrams. We would like to invite you to tryouts tomorrow, 6pm at the college court. We also encourage you to bring friends who are intrested. We hope to see you tomorrow. Thank you."

Oha! They invited me to try out! Bull!

The Sweet Escape

If I could escape, and recreate a place that's my own world and I could be your favorite girl forever, perfectly together. Now tell me, wouldn't that be sweet?

Bittersweet Symphony

"You deserve much much worse for all your lies and bullshitting.. You don't love me, you just love lying, two-timing, and destroying every relationship you get into 'cause you're too into yourself that you never think of anyone else. You never try to please anyone else unless it benefits you or serves a purpose for you. I thought you changed nung naging tayo pero hindi rin pala. Hinintay mo lang magsawa ka then you moved on and never ever tried to work things out. Have fun destroying your new relationship. Hope matagalan ka nya."
- from one special person.

Go figure.

I'll just be waiting for karma. Hope it strikes me bad. I deserve it anyway.

I love you always, I'm sorry.

One Word

1. Yourself? selfish

2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend? complicated

3. Your hair? short

4. Your mother? scary

5. Your Father? smart

6. Your Favorite Item:

7. Your dream last night: forgot

8. Your Favorite drink: water

9. Your Dream Car: nada

10. The room you are in: mine

11. Your Ex's: friends

12. Your fear: isolation

13. What you want to be in 10 years: rich

14. What You're NOT? loyal

15. Muffins: nya

16: One of Your Wish List Items: swimsuit

18: Time: fast

19. The Last Thing You Did: powerpoint

20. What You Are Wearing: daster (Haha)

21. Your Favorite Weather: sunny

22. Your Favorite Book:

23. The Last Thing You Ate: noodles

24. Your Life: interesting

25. Your Mood:

26. Your friends: love

27. What are you thinking about right now? future

28. Your cellphone: L6

29. What are you doing at the moment? printing

30. Your summer: anticipating

31. Your relationship status: complicated

32. What is on your tv? none

33. What is the weather like? humid

34. When is the last time you laughed? kanina

35. What do you do when you can't sleep? secret

My Addiction is Back!

American Idol Season Six Baby!


My favorite: LAKISHA JONES. My God, can this girl sing or what?!?! I love her facial expressions when she sings.




My special favorite: CHRIS SLIGH. His humor is soooo out of this world! I lalalalalove it! He's like Conan O'Brien!



A Chris Sligh Interview:

What would people be surprised to learn about you?
I’m chubby.

How has this changed your life?
It hasn’t yet, except to make me poorer b/c of taking off so much work.

Do you have any lucky charms?
Yes, they’re magically delicious.

Karen 101

Have you ever looked at a picture of yourself and see a stranger in the background? It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other people's lives have you been in? Were you a part of someone's life when their dreams came true? Or were you there when their dreams died? Did you keep trying to get in, as if you were somehow destined to be there? Or did the shock take you by surprise? Just think, you'd be a big part of someone else's life, and not even know it.

They say you could tell a person by looking at the group she's in. Let's see. I have my highschool friends: Ning, Mar, Ecai, Chai, Dior, Diana, and Jack. Not to mention my other high school friends Icay, Janis, Rej, Nash, Melo, IV4, my batch, plus my EXs. Being with them brings me back to so many incomparable moments. I call them my happy girls for it's only with them that I get to laugh that hard. I have my Ateneo people: JM, Alex, Chocho, Wenki, Jen, Chris, Dian, and Inigo. I love these gorgeous people to death. I call them my fab darlings. They have the most expensive and fab stuff most of the time, but their happiness come from the simplest of things. I have the You and Me, or so I thought I had them. I hope I still do. They're Aidz, Eli, Bok, Taker, Fred, Moch, Doms, JP, Drei, JC, etc. I call them my steady people because literally, they are steady people. I have my MC family: Thea, Pat, Ley, Roca, Moya, Piper, Vir, Keith, Gaf, Karla, Kharmi, etc. I call them my good-times people because with them, even the bad times become good. I have my cousins with whom I feel most comfortable with. They're my go-to people because they usually know when to save me, even when I don't ask for their help. Plus I have my other special friends: Sab, Anji, Wax, Jodie, Tiffy, etc. My heart will always have a space for them.

So there. Those are my possies. They are all totally different and yet I can relate to them all. Who I am then?! Does one group think of me differently than the other? I hope not for I try to be as consistent as possible.

I am Ma. Katrina Sillador Sangalang. Some people call me Karen, close friends call me Kar. I hate it when they call me Kat, the You and Me call me Ka. I am supposed to be 21 years old, but my mind and actions say I'm not. I live at New Manila, one of my favorite places in Quezon City. I've been here since I was in 2nd Grade and I doubt that we'll be moving to another house anytime soon. I don't have a lot of childhood memories, although memories from high school up to the present keep me contented. I have my immediate family who, I believe, hasn't seen the real me yet. What and how they think of me is totally different from who I really am. I am not trying to sound like a rebel here, I'm just misunderstood by them, that's all. Despite all the family drama crap though, I love them to death. Always have, always will. I treasure all my friends and I try to keep conflicts away from me as much as possible. I hate confrontations. I hate losing friends. I try to maintain good relationships with the people I meet.

St. John Child Care Center was where I had my first set of friends. I transferred to St. Theresa's College after. Eleven wonderful years of my life were spent there. It's where I grew up, basically. It will always be my home. Went to Ateneo de Mla University after high school. How I wish I went to La Salle instead. I transferred to Miriam College after three grueling years in ADMU. I've always been smart in school although my attitude and my way of thinking towards school sometimes pull me down. I am finally starting to accept that I am oftentimes irresponsible. I am starting to change, by the way. From now on, less parties and more schoolwork for me.

I worked for Tyler part-time last semester and I loved every minute of it. Even though I was complaining and whining and cursing during the latter part of my contract, I knew then that I still love what I was doing. I love the people. They are all fab. I miss Ida, Na, Abby, Nina, Di, Reg, Lala, Sidney, Warner, Georgia, and Sugar.

I've had eight (or nine?) serious relationships in my life. I've cheated on all of them and I've never been proud of it. I loved them all despite all the lies, I hope they know that. I still do actually. All the people with whom I've shared my life with are wonderful, amazing people and I wish them all the best. They will always be special to me.

I was always the biggest fan of love. That makes me wonder sometimes if that may be the reason why I oftentimes take and take and take love without thinking of the consequences of my actions. I want to make one thing clear though: I never cheated just so another person could fill in for the shortcomings of the other. It was never that way. I just didn't know how and when to limit myself from loving. I love the people I loved for who they are and that was enough. We all had our shortcomings but that was never a reason for me to cheat.

I love to be surrounded by people. I hate it when I'm home. I'd rather be alone smoking, or reading a book, or doing nothing at Starbucks than be stuck at home watching TV. Being around people, especially by the people I love, gives me that unexplainable high. I was never the introvert type, obviously. Oh, I won the Most Friendly award when I was in Preschool. Wala lang. Haha!

I am funny and I know it. It's a wonderful gift that I got from my dad. It's amazing how with just one word, you can make the whole group laugh their hearts out. I love making people laugh. It's like therapy.

I used to drink moderately but sadly, its been beer all day, everyday. I'm not proud of that too. It's because of that excessive drinking that I've been trying to watch what I eat now. I've been gaining a lot of pounds and I hate it. I hate that I'm trying to go on a pseudo strict diet right now. It's so not me. I love to eat. I love food. I love love love Chinese food, fast food, Japanese food, Italian, Spanish, American, even street food, heck I love them all. Except for veggies, of course. I don't eat vegetables. Oh and I don't eat dinuguan.

I hate people who act and think like they rule the world and that they're so much better than everybody else. They are all losers, in my opinion. I don't get mad that easily and if I actually do get mad at someone, that person won't ever notice. Unless of course that person knows me by heart already.

I smoke a lot. I wish I could cut down but I'm not that determined so maybe next year will be the year I"ll lessen my excessive intake of nicotine. I want to quit smoking when I'm thirty. I have to.

I hate snakes. Even typing the word gives me the creeps. All snakes should be eradicated from Earth.

I am a brat. I am crabby most of the time. I am moody when I wake up. I usually don't care what other people would think of me. I do what I want all the time. I am hard headed. According to Jacq, I'm the most spoiled person she has ever met. According to a friend, I am the most flirtatious though I doubt that I am. I am just friendly. People say I'm sweet and endearing. Close friends know I'm a backstabber. I can't keep a secret. I try my best to keep other people's secrets but sometimes, I just have to tell it to someone.

I listen to almost all types of music. I hate Gregorian chants. I listen to Pop when I'm in a good mood. I listen to r&b and hiphop when I want to dance. I listen to Eraserheads when I'm depressed. I listen to sappy songs when I'm heartbroken. I listen to sappy songs when it's raining. I listen to Alternative when I'm jolly. I am not a rock person but I love Alternative music, contrary to popular beliefs. I love Alternative songs. They don't bombard the lyrics with the words I love you, yet you could still feel the intensity of love in the song.

Movies are my stress relievers. TV Series are the second on my list. I adore One Tree Hill, I love Grey's Anatomy. I used to watch NipTuck and Lost. I might like Heroes. I don't know yet, I'll start watching it next week.

I am always driven by my passion. I see to it that I do what I love and that I excel in it. I was never happy with my course in Ateneo. Three years in Economics, imagine that. I love love love my course in Miriam College now. Marketing is the perfect choice. It's my perfect choice. It's who I really am and I believe that it's what I was destined to take. At least I hope it is.

Someday, when I become insanely rich, I will have my own Advertising Empire. I will donate money to charity. Heck, I'll even start my own foundation for abused women and for children. I will buy my own dolphins and God knows how much I will love them. I will buy all the clothes, shoes, bags, and accessories that I want. I will travel all over the world with my family. I will make sure that my children get to see wonderful things.

I could go on and on blabbing about myself and yet, for some reason, I still wouldn't know who I really am.

Mirror mirror on the wall, who is Kar after all?

Just so you know

This feeling is taking control of me, and I can't help but give in sometimes. Please, just let me do things my way. I am trying my best to fix things, trust me. I just really have to do things on my own right now.

I don't want to think anymore. I just want to go somewhere far away, some place where noone can find me. That's where I'll lie down and live.

We ride

This is an entry devoted to defend my MC family.

I have never really accepted the thought that I was in MC until I met these wonderful group of people. They were the ones who reminded me that life will always be easy if I surround myself with the right people.

We may seem like the most delinquent group of people you'll ever meet for drinking almost everyday, may it me day or night, but WE ARE, in my opinion, MORE RESPONSIBLE than most students. We get good grades, we pass our requirements, we attend important seminars, we build good relationships with professors - what more could you want from us? Why does our "we love to party all the time" state bother a lot of you guys? If it doesn't bother us, then others don't have to be bothered for us.

We are not bad influences to one another. What I do has nothing to do with them. I make decisions for myself, while others make theirs for themselves too. We just make sure that whatever comes out of our decisions, we are there when needed. When things get out of hand, that's when we interrupt. We never dictate, we just advise.

We are not pure booze. We don't just drink, you know. We can be serious too. In fact, we talk about serious matters all the time. I learn from these people everyday. I'm sometimes amazed by the depth of the things they say actually.

I love them, so please stop judging them. It's fine time you accept them for who they are, the way I have accepted them. They have accepted me, and I am very thankful for that.

I miss

Tyler.

Truth

Can't believe how you set me free
The way you purify this soul, dont you know?
Got you into my arms now I'm never letting go
This old dog is finally home.