my insights

reflections: Ermita, A filipino novel by F. Sionil Jose. read it, it's captivating to the very last page.


Such colorful individuals we are in this huge canvass that is called life, and yet there’s this one thing that would always unify us, and that’s happiness.

“We move on, we build and create because we are unhappy” –Didi Gamboa

Ermita, to me, is not about “an enclave of privilege and affluence, and the putrefaction of a society.” F. Sionil Jose’s “Ermita”, I believe, is a story about that great search for genuine happiness, not just by Ermi, but also by all the other characters, amidst their backgrounds, social status, beliefs, and way of living. It is their search for that “something unknown” that actually made the whole novel more interesting, more captivating to the very last page.

Happiness can never be found in things that are physical, that’s one thing I picked up from the novel. Happiness can only be found in love, the kind that demands nothing in return. It is in this genuine love that a person can feel the contentment, that unexplainable happiness, only a few of us could ever experience and appreciate.

Robert Fulghum said: “I believe that dreams are more powerful than facts – that hope always triumphs over experience – that laughter is the only cure for grief.” I believe so too. I believe that hope, the ultimate driving force, makes us strong individuals as we face different challenges along the path to happiness. It is already innate in us humans to look for something more. Sadly though, a lot of us, myself included, find happiness in all the wrong places. I can’t blame them. Even Rolando Cruz thinks so too: “There is so much dishonesty today, not just in government but in business. Perhaps sex is the only honest thing left.” My god, is Rolando right in saying that? If so, will we ever find true happiness? What if the real hindrance to our own happiness is ourselves?

Living now in a materialistic world, it is so easy for money and power to trick us, letting us feel that there’s no better joy than acquiring them. Those with weak and distorted foundation fall easily into the trap of deceit. True though that for a moment, one would feel the “happiness” that money and power bring. If I were to become powerful, and rich, a lot of people would automatically love me, adore me even. By then I could afford everything, though I doubt that I’ll be contented. Too much dependence on the material and the physical, including sex, can bring negative effects to ourselves, to others, and to God. Dependency, in fact, is the inability to experience wholes, or to function adequately without the certainty that one is actively cared for by another. Take Ermi for example. She had everything during her peak – luxurious cars, mink coats, a well used passport, and the like, but she was never completely happy.

Dependency, on the contrary, can be healthy too. We all have desires to be cared for by persons stronger than us who have our interests truly at heart. Come to think of it, we need the presence of others to be truly happy. We need to know, to feel, that we are also needed by others. If not, then existence has no value.

There are definitely things that money can’t buy – happiness is one. It is not in having everything that a person becomes truly happy. It is in having some, and being thankful for all the gifts received, appreciating them as much as one can. Happiness is always rooted in love, the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s growth.

When happiness comes knocking, never let it pass, for it only comes once. No one is too old to experience happiness; there’s no such thing as too late. All you have to do is be sensitive of its presence. For all we know, its been there all along. We were just foolish enough to believe that there are far better things. Reality is, not all situations have better sides to them. All that’s left is what’s there the whole time, wanting to be appreciated for all its effort. No one wants to be like Ermi, regretful in the end, right?