a paradox

was at Quattro last Thursday night. my girls were there: sab and gi. we had to go out. we all had our own reasons for wanting, no,i think the perfect word would be NEEDING to go out. lex and the others were there. gawd, chubi was there too. proud, NORMAL, pathetic shit. anyway, i had fun. in fact, i had so much fun! its been awhile since i last went out with a new set of people. my nights would usually be with the claret boys or my ateneo friends. im not complaining. its just so refreshing being around people you don't really know that well. gawd. such a memorable night. thanks sab. thanks gi. you made me smile.

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on the other hand

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im sad. nothing's going right.
i try to keep it together, but im sooo falling apart.


im so tired, i feel so uninspired. i scared of this feeling.